It ain't over
Played at Wadham College Ground, Oxford
By Simon Hemelrk (wicketkeeper)
It is appropriate, is it not, that one of Wadham College's most
famous alumni is Michael Foot? The former Labour leader's career had
many parallels with the Old Fallopians.
Some said he was too old, some that his dress sense was poor and
made him look foolish (Peter), others pointed out that he needed to
walk with a stick. And the veteran politician also had one of his
best victories whilst at Wadham College
when he was elected to Parliament in 1935, still a student, aged
The Old Fallopians' Wadham triumph came this Sunday in a
performance that left the form book not just upset but positively
pre-menstrual. No one could have expected the Old Fallopians, even
whilst boosted by the illustrious presence of such names as Roy,
Paleit, Southey and Venables to triumph over those mythical, fishy
titans the Mermaids.
But, like plucky Michael Foot in those pre-war days of ladies
ankles and gentlemen's excuse-mes, triumph we did.
How? Why? Here's how/why:
We batted first.
|Roy, J (South Africa)
||A bumptious, pinch-hitting 13.
|Venables, M (girlfriend's central London flat)
||Classy. Should have got more than 27, but
a solid start to the innings.
|Paleit, E (Oxfordshire)
||A correct, well-paced 35. Included
several "leaves" that drew oohs from the crowd.
|Press, R (The City)
||When this man drops anchor, said anchor has been
dropped. Steady support. 6 off 108 balls.
|Barrass, P (Vaudeville)
||Fast-paced, thrilling 51. Widow Twanky
gives it some spanky. Arguably ran out Paleit, however. Oh yes
he did. Oh no he didn't. We may never get answers. Certainly
shouldn't have been given run out himself. A bearded travesty.
|AK Southey (Hyundai Getz)
||Your perfect number 6. Gave it some humpty for a
|Hemelryk, S (Crapstone, near Yelverton, Devon)
||Has had training at the Oval recently. A fact
lost on him and everyone watching when he gets to the crease. A
|Castle, T (Tufnell Park)
||Bumped it around a bit. Pulled his hamstring, as
|Frisby, P (Up-and-coming Hackney)
||A fine splatt of a late-innings knock. 10.
|Sultanti, D (Planet Rock)
||Another good ball-spraying, late-on. 7.
Then, we bowled.
And they knocked it around effortlessly. Nothing too much wrong with
the bowling. They just dug in and concentrated.
After 30 overs they
were winning easily. Then, with all of around 20 needed and five
wickets remaining, it was time to unleash AK "Step it up! Step it
First he spins out a man who hadn't shaved, but was very
to talk to during the tea interval. Then, their best batsmen, whose
glasses masked a flashing talent, was run out, followed by AK taking
John "I can remember when all this was volcanoes" Shaw
chipped in with one more. Four wickets gone, but only two needed.
can't win this, can we? Let's all crowd round the bat and see.
Southey! We can.
Our first ever victory against the Mermaids. Fin-tastic.
The beer match after wasn't much to write home about, so I shan't.
|Plucky losers: The Mermaids
Grand vista: Mark Venables limbers up before opening the
Photo: Tim Castle
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